While I appreciate your ability to entertain yourself, repeatedly jumping on and off the bed while yowling like you have been shot is a bit distracting at 4:30 in the morning. (It was, however, amusing & impressive to watch you leap from the head of the bed to the floor at the foot.)
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| This is not what you want to see first in the morning. |
Please note that 5:30 am is also not an appropriate time to be yowling like a banshee on fire. And in case you have forgotten, breakfast is at 7:30, and waking me up before that is just not cool. If you must wake me up, please avoid the following:
-biting my nose, fingers, or chin (also unacceptable: biting my forehead. which is apparently possible)
-standing on my throat, boobs, or bladder. unless you would like to be thrown across the room.
-doing that creepy thing where you stare at me with your face about an inch away from mine until I open my eyes
-knocking all of the items off of my nightstand/desk/kitchen counter
-repeatedly banging the cupboards, because for the love of all that is holy, I have neighbors and they are going to cook you into a stir fry if you do not stop that terrible noise.
Love,
The woman who feeds you and seriously needs her sleep
P.S. Please note that I pee before you eat. Always.
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